This weekend is very needed. I've had a really stressful past few weeks, and the upcoming 2-3 more be just as bad. I have a lot of work deadlines that have been looming over me, that will continue to do so. Additionally, I've been dealing with my mother's issues. Nothing new, just the same old stuff. We got into an epic fight last week and it's just a lot to deal with.

Last night after I got done with work, I came home and made dinner. I oven roasted veggies (mushrooms, onions, a ton of garlic, potatoes, peppers.. I should have bought some carrots and peas too, oh well next time!) in some olive oil and spices. Then combined it with couscous that also had some olive oil and garlic in it. I also baked some cornbread muffins to accompany it and we had Thomas Kemper root beer and Tillamook vanilla bean ice cream, root beer floats. Mmmmmmm. This morning. we woke up and had breakfast, then took Kira to the dog park. She had a lot of fun, and ran around for over an hour before we left. We've been taking her to Sand Point a lot lately, and just going to the small dog area. She doesn't seem to mind not running around the rest of the area, and she loves being able to actually play with the other dogs and not get eaten by them. After that, we brought her home and went shopping at Target to get some stuff for the house. When we got home Scott took a nap (like usual) and I cleaned the house (like usual). Not only did I do the normal stuff like laundry and dishes and vacuuming.. but I also vacuumed the table off (it has like.. these grooves in it that collect crumbs and flecks of paper and stuff) and, more importantly, deep cleaned the downstairs carpet. I took a bowl and combined floor cleaner, oxyclean and some boiling hot water and then poured it all over the pee-stained carpet. I scrubbed it and let it sit, poured another batch on, then vacuumed it all out and it is wonnddeerrrfullllll. No more smelling like pee downstairs (yay!).

After cleaning Scott woke up (funny timing, eh? I kid!) we made dinner (hamburgers, mmm) and now I'm sitting in bed with my laptop watching the Olympics with Kira asleep on my legs. We were considering going down to Fremont to see Cloverfield at the outdoor movies tonight, but it's cold and wet out. Tomorrow we're going to the Ballard Farmer's market in the morning and then going to see Pineapple Express in the afternoon. It should be fun. I've had a good weekend so far. I'm looking forward to the rest of the weekend, and to next week so I can get back to work and trudge through it to my deadlines. September will be a somewhat less stressful month, and I'm VERY much looking forward to it at this point.

This is why I can't watch videos at work. I started crying. God I suck.

The story of the Hugging Lion.

It's been a hellacious week and I am SO FUCKING READY for the weekend to happen so I can partially unwind, have a few drinks, be around fun people and not worry about shit for a few days. With huge deadlines looming over my head at work, and the daunting task of a 20% increase in my already intense workload.. I'm just.. mentally drained. It will get better though. Eventually. It has to. I love my job, it's just a lot to tackle at once.

We went and saw Stepbrothers tonight. It was really funny. Really, really funny. I recommend it, A++.

And now, I'm going to bed.

I won't suffer, be broken, get tired, or wasted
Surrender to nothing, or give up what I
Started and stopped it, from end to beginning
A new day is coming, and I am finally free

I would have kept you, forever, but we had to sever
It ended for both of us, faster than a
Kill off this thinking, it's starting to sink in
I'm losing control now, and without you I can finally see

I am so fucking emo today.

Dear Comcast,

First of all, fuck you. Not only do you overcharge for your shit services, but they don't fucking work. Our cable box broke two months after you gave it to us. Several calls to your tech support later, we went to switch it with a "new" model this afternoon. Got it home, plugged it in, guess what IT DOESNT FUCKING WORK.

So now I sit on the phone, waiting to speak again to your shitty ass tech support. Who the hell knows when this problem will be fixed, and in the meantime I'm restricted to the 70 channels that I get without the box, even though I'm paying for 400. Good god damn job.

Fuck you very much,
Mindy

This will be really fast.. as I'm leaving in five minutes to go to lunch. I wanted to updated the LJ with what's going on with my .. sickness, I guess.

The day after I went to Urgent Care, my doctor called and said it's not pancreatitis. So yay for that. They ran a ton more tests, including baby tests (even though I assured them you have to have sex for that to happen, and I'm married), Ecoli, Salmonella (sp), and called me back this morning. Everything came back negative, no infections, no increased levels of enzymes, nothing. I'm taking 2 Zantac 150's a day to control the severe bloating I'm encountering, but it's only helping so much. I can't eat greasy food, fast food, nothing like that. I've been eating mostly hummus, soup, and otter pops since last week.

Basically, they don't know what's wrong, and unless it gets worse (the pain, that is), they're not going to do anything. If it still hurts next week, they want me to come in to get a scope put down my throat to see if they can find the source of the inflammation/pain. I really don't want that to happen, but I'm sick of feeling like shit constantly. It's been a week and a half, what the fuck.

Okay, off to lunch.

I went to work this morning, bright and early, and was in so much pain two hours later that I left. I came home, laid in bed, miserable, called a half dozen doctors to see if I could get an appointment (answer: no), and then decided to go to Urgent Care. Even if I do have food poisoning, I don't think it should last five days.

So Urgent care. It was my first time going to one, and it was a good experience, all considered. I waited about 35 minutes before being seen, the nurses and doctors were all really nice. After doing an exam and asking a half million questions the doctor came up with three possibilities. I might have the following: a really severe case of food poisoning, pancreatitis and/or appendicitis. Awesome. He said that normally food poisoning only lasts a day or two, so it is rare to be hanging out so long. They pulled a metric shit ton of blood out of me, made me pee in a cup, and sent me on my way until tomorrow morning. Hopefully they should have the results by then. I guess I just have to play it by ear for now, but I hope that I'm not dying. I certainly feel like it.

After Urgent Care Scott convinced me, forced me, whatever, to go by a T-Mobile store. We've been wanting to sign up for awhile, but our contract with AT&T just ended a few days ago so yeah. I've been with AT&T for 10 years, but they have shitty phones and shitty price plans.

Scott just farted and blamed it on Kira. Gross ass.

I have an appointment this afternoon, another appointment, and one tomorrow. I'm sick of doctors. I want to just lay in bed and not move for a few days. Blah.

Today is a bad day. The last few days were bad days. I'm still sick, and I'm now thinking that it's not food poisoning, but the black plague. Honestly, I'm not sure what's wrong.. Scott brought up a valid theory yesterday.. I may have accidentally eaten meat on Friday. Considering, the last time I felt like this, it was because I ate meat that was ground into my food (that I couldn't see). But then again, when that happened I threw up, then felt sick for a day or so.. but not even close to this.

I'm at work currently, but my stomach has been aching all day long, and I've had a headache since last Wednesday. Today has been an extremely productive day at work, I knew it would be which is why I didn't go home mid-day. I can't wait to go home and just die. I want to just lay and bed and not move for 12 hours. Ugh. I don't think it helps that it is really warm out and nowhere in Seattle has A/C. Last night I slept with no blanket, a fan on top of me, almost completely naked and still was sweating for the majority of the night. Yech. I'm glad that Seattle only has 3 hot days a year, we're almost done with them.

In other news, I scheduled an eye appointment for Wednesday after work. My eyesight is progressing to the point where I'm having problems seeing more than 5-10 feet away. We'll see what happens with that. It bothers me the most when I'm driving, but it always bugs me.. not being able to read. Although I find it amusing that because I haven't been able to see far away letters for so long, that I can decipher the shapes of letters now.

What's the worst thing that could happen this weekend, barring natural disaster or death? This weekend Pride weekend, which is the picture of perfect weather. The best weekend of the year, the one that only happens once a year.

I got sick. Not just sniffles and a cough sick, I got food poisoning. I've never, in my life, had food poisoning, yet I got it last night from P.F. Chang. After dinner we saw Wanted, and the theatre was so packed we had to sit in the second row. I got sick halfway through the movie and spent the second half with my eyes closed, trying to not throw up again. I thought that after a few hours of sleep I'd feel better and today would be perfect, I went yesterday and spent $100 on new clothes even. But no. I woke up this morning with the most intense stomach pains I've felt in a very, very long time. I have slept for the better part of the day, sweating so much that I soaked through my shirt and partially the bed.

I better feel good tomorrow, because I will be pissed if I miss the parade and the block party. But seriously, wtf body, why this weekend. :(

It's been a wee-bit stressful at work the past week, since "the incident". Whatever, I'm putting my head down and focusing, trying to get my work cranked out as fast as possible. I have major, MAJOR deadlines coming up and if I keep the pace I currently have, I should meet them. We'll see. I got into it with a dealer today. People with unrealistic expectations, I hates them. It happens, I am in control of the issue, and have already taken measures to make sure he doesn't freak out on other people.. as well as fast-tracking his site. I don't like to reward assholes for being a jerk to everyone, but sometimes it's easier to just give them what they want instead of fighting for an hour about it. He was playing the blame game, blaming me and my organization for everything (including the bad economy, how the fuck is that my problem?). This is what I had to say about it, to Scott, later.

mindywcblt (10:49:40 AM): heres a clue, mr car dealer
mindywcblt (10:49:53 AM): no one wants GM cars because they are too expensive, too big, and take too much gas
mindywcblt (10:49:58 AM): he also has a honda dealership
mindywcblt (10:50:08 AM): and he said hes sold "like a million" hondas in the past month, but only 20 GM
mindywcblt (10:50:10 AM): well no shit
mindywcblt (10:50:19 AM): that doesn't have to do with marketing
mindywcblt (10:50:40 AM): if you have an issue with that, maybe go talk to saudi arabia or something, christ brother thats not my problem

My mom called me the other day and told me she might have brain cancer, but not to tell my father. Later, when I told my therapist about this, she actually laughed out loud and asked if I was serious. This isn't the first time she's done this, a few times when I was living at home she told he she had breast cancer, lung cancer, liver cancer, etc. I don't know whether to believe her, though she says she's going for a CT scan next week. My puppy, Kira, who is the sweetest and happiest dog I've ever met, has a lump on her leg. We got it checked out a few weeks ago and now we're playing "the waiting game", to see if it goes away, otherwise she'll undergo surgery so they can biopsy it and see if it is cancer.

I don't know what's worse, not caring at all that my mother may have cancer, or being really scared that my dog might. I don't know. I'm still at work, and it's break time though, so I'm out.

Today has arguably been one of the worst days I've had in a very, very long time, and without doubt the worst day I've ever had professionally. Ever. I've learned more, today, about the way this company we both call home, with works, then most people have in months. I spent the morning crying and feeling victimized, like I had done something really wrong. Like I was a bad person and I deserve being blamed and martyred for something that I didn't do. I felt betrayed by you, because you've spent the past six weeks convincing me at every turn that I could trust you, come to you with anything, you were in my corner. I felt like it was my fault.

But you know what? It's fucking not. It's not my fucking fault. So if you want to play this game, we can play it. You might be some complex ridden faggy fucking queen bitch, but you will NOT intimidate me or make me feel less than you. You want to play games with my job, with my livelihood? Fucking bring it on.

I'm over it. I'm over you. Fuck you.

Love always,
Mindy

P.S. "We got along until you did that.. cause without me, you know you’re lost wise up now or pay the cost."

I hate my neighbors. Honestly, I think hate is not strong enough a word. They are single handedly the most inconsiderate, selfish, completely dumb fucking people I've ever had the horror of living next to. Not only does their dog park incessantly day and night, not ONLY do they hog all of the space in our backyard (in addition to theirs) so much that we can't even take Kira out back to go to the bathroom, not only do they suck at life and enjoy having 15 million things in their "backyard" area (including, but not limited to: a full size propane BBQ, 5-6 plastic chairs, several bikes, a FUCKING KAYAK, a half dozen windsocks/flags/windchimes), but today takes the mother fucking cake. They've been out there since before we woke up this morning (10am). We've had to take Kira across the street to go to the bathroom all day because they're in OUR FUCKING YARD. However, when we came home a few minutes ago from a movie and looked outside to see if they were there.. this is what we saw.



If you can't see what this is, I'll caption it for you. They're outside with all of their white trash glory, sitting in lawn chairs from Kmart, with their dog tied up to a 75 foot chain (when their "backyard" area is only about 15 feet), and the icing on the cake.. they have their granddaughter naked.. in a bucket. Fucking naked, in a fucking bucket. I think my brain is going to pop out of my skull and kill every single person within a ten mile radius. Fuck you neighbors, fuck you. If there is any kind of god you will all die horribly in a fire for being such obvious jerks to every single person in the rest of the world.

I woke up this morning to my alarm at 6:20am and the first thing I heard after the song quickly ended was...

"You're listening to Seattle's best C89.5. It's Friday, good morning!"

I couldn't agree more.

We went to the ocean for Memorial Day weekend, Scott, Delaine and myself and our three dogs. It was a lot of fun, and a needed break from the stressors of everyday life.

I'm just so frustrated lately, with a lot of facets of my life, not something specific. Professionally, everything is going outstandingly well, and I am still loving.loving.loving my job. Outside of work, things are just.. bad. I'm at this place where I have no answers for the questions in my life, and don't know what I can do to change this. All the plans I had, the goals I had months and years ago, aren't really panning out and theres no change in the works. I feel almost like I'm in a cage, like I'm being held captive to myself. It doesn't make sense. I don't make sense, it's all jumbled in my head.

We're getting Cambodian noodles for lunch. I'm excited.

I was at work today, my head pounding from 6 hours of BTB's greatest mix, included are: the Eagles, Josh Groban, REO speedwagon, and every other horrible band from the past thirty years that I can't even remember the names for.

And then I realized, I really, really, really want to smoke some pot. Is that weird? I haven't smoked any in two years, and before that, probably another year or two. The strangest cravings, people.

Yesterday I was taking Kira out to go to the bathroom first thing in the morning. We sleepily walked outside only to find Mothercunt (the new nickname for my neighbor: MC for short) outside with her nasty little weiner dog and her two little grandkids. Now, let me say, I like to be friends with my neighbors, if at all possible. I am stupidly laid back about noise and annoying habits, because I'd rather be friends then fight with them. Who knows when you'll need to borrow something random from them one day? Anyway, so I walk outside and Kira immediately freaks out because the dog is on it's 50 foot long rope (not exaggerating, it's a 50' cord that is attached to her door and she puts her dog out on it all the time), and standing in front of my back door. She runs over to play with the weiner dog and he freaked out and started trying to bite her. So I reign her over to TSA's yard (other neighbor, we call her TSA because she works for airport security, we think) and try to get her away from the weiner dog. All the while MC is sitting outside her door, smoking a cig, while her two grandkids run around and their dog is freaking out and still trying to come after Kira. A few minutes of this and MC FINALLY pulls the dog back near her so Kira can at least calm down a little bit. Kira does her business and I try to get her to go back into the house before she starts freaking out again.

At this point MC asks me how old Kira is, I tell her about 7-8 months. She tells me that her dog (Billy..? Belly? something like that) is a year old. The next part goes like this.

MC: By the way, I just wanted to let you know that the dog won't be barking this week. I'm taking care of it.
Me: Oh, okay, well, I didn't actually complain to Matt (the manager). He said that he heard it from his house.
MC: Well I don't care, I just wanted to let you know.
Me: Uh.. okay.. thanks.
MC: I wish someone would have told me he was barking, I didn't know he was or that it was bothering people.
Me: *thinking* You're a lying bitch *saying* Oh, well, I should get inside. Have a nice day!

I realize that through text you can't hear her condescending, bitchy tone, but trust me, she was clearly pissed off and wanting me to know it. Either way, I'll take bitchy and condescending from her if it means being able to sleep in the morning. I went about the rest of my day, got my stuff ready for work this morning, as today was the start of my new schedule. From here on out I will be working from 7am-4pm. It's not bad, it's not too early and I still get off early enough to enjoy the afternoon and evening. Regardless, I have to start waking up at 6am, if I push it, 6:15. I went to bed around 10pm, and finally fell asleep around 1am, frustrated that I knew I wasn't going to get much sleep at all (ugh). But when 5AM rolled around, I heard MC leave her house. She normally leaves between 5am-7am, and for the first 10-15 minutes I was relieved, I couldn't hear the dog at all. Thank god, it's not barking anymore, it's a miracle, right?

Wrong. Dead, fucking wrong.

5:15am the dog starts barking (or I just start hearing the dog bark). It wakes me from my half-sleep and I was up from then on. She didn't do ANYTHING to get the dog to stop barking, all she did was move it from the living room to the upstairs bedroom. And then decided to leave the windows open upstairs as well. So not only can I hear it loud and fucking clear from everywhere in my house, so can everyone on the north side of the building. This includes about 10 units from our townhouses, and then a ton of apartments on the other side of the fence, and a hospital. It was barking so loud that I couldn't even think straight, at 5:15 in the fucking morning. I don't believe her when she says that she didn't know it was barking. I think she is a lying, cunt of a woman. And this? She moved it from the downstairs so Matt (apt manager) can't hear it anymore. The downstairs windows face his house, and now it's in the opposite part of the house. I've been recording every single day that it's happened and at what time, and I'm holding Matt to his promise. Two more weeks to get the fucking dog to shut up or she's being evicted. Two weeks as of last Friday.

This bitch has been on my nerves since day one of her move in, I've honestly never had a more disrespectful, selfish neighbor ever. Even the fat Hawaiians, even Damian and his crazy ass, even Ron, good old pervy Ron. And if she gets evicted, I'm throwing a party in her honor. 11 days and counting bitch.

I'm bored to shit at work and wanted to post this important article about Gay Marriage in California. Below is an excerpt, making me want to not stab Arnold in the face for the first time in a long time.

"Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, a moderate Republican who has vetoed past bills aimed at legalizing same-sex marriage, issued a brief statement saying he would not support a constitutional amendment that would overturn the court’s ruling. “I respect the court’s decision and as governor I will uphold its ruling,” the Mr. Schwarzenegger said."

It's far from a ringing endorsement, but you have to start somewhere.

P.S. My neighbor's dog is still barking everyday from 6AM-6PM. I'm going to buy a bark collar and put it on their doorstep.. or kill it. Or her. Grr.

I'm still pissed at my neighbor. She didn't leave home until around 9AM today, so no having to deal with the 6AM barking, but the minute she left that fucking dog started going and didn't stop until after I got home from work, around 6PM. So help me if she leaves early tomorrow. I started doing audio recordings from my bedroom of the noise and then documenting when it starts and when it (roughly) stops. If it continues much longer I will be talking to our apartment manager about it. Honestly, I don't know what good that will do, but she needs to figure something out. She can't cage her dog all day and let it bark for 12+ hours straight. That's not fair to her neighbors OR more importantly the dog himself. He's probably scared out of his mind. Sigh. Fucking bitch.

I took some crazy pictures of Kira tonight I wanted to share. She was mid-puppy time and I was snapping away and got some funny/cute ones. Enjoy.


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In other news, I'm still madly in love with my job. And my house. And my boy. And my Kira (okay Stella too, and of course Aleutia!). Things are going well. I need to go to the gym tomorrow. I need to go to bed now so I can be to work at 8AM. So that should be all for now. Lata.

Dear new neighbors,

It is 7:45AM. You left the house at 6AM today, and left your stupid fucking dog in a cage. It has been barking non-stop ever since. Not only is the barking keeping me awake, but it is keeping my dog awake. I am NOT a morning person and if this becomes a pattern I may just leave rat poison on your fucking doorstep.

Please die in a mother fucking fire.

Love,
Mindy